What do you think????

At church we sit on the balcony with the kids. There the kids can run around and since the congregation up there is mostly parents and small kids, no one minds the noise these kids create.

Yesterday among others Dan and another boy his age were running around. Each on their own. They never even crossed paths. Suddenly this other boy runs to dan and whacks him on his face- no provocation. Before either Gin or me moved, the other boys mom ran to him, and pulled him off with a very stern look. The boys continued running and after about 5 minutes the same scene is repeated. This time the other boys mom went and carried him off and Gin went and took Dan off too. The other mom was scolding her boy and he was clearly upset. Screaming and hitting the mother. Finally his dad stepped in and took him outside. Daniel was least bothered , I guess mainly because it didn’t hurt him at all.

That is how small kids are. You can never say what is their next course of action. They act without any provocation and there is no point in reasoning with them. Dan has done worst things. He has bitten two little cousins of his. One was very deserving(no, that doent mean that Dan has any right to hurt the child. I agree he was completely wrong) and the other was without the least provocatoion. But I give full credit to the parents of that boy, because they acted as responsible adults and stopped their son and when the act was repeated, firmly put him in his place. Good for them and their son…

Now there was this other mom and son standing in front of me. The boy has a nice sipper with Thomas the engine on it. Dan was quiet fascinated with that. He casually walked, bent down and picked the sipper from the side pocket of that lady’s bag. As Dan’s mom, I know he only wanted to see the engine picture on it and his intention was not to drink from it. While I was moving forward to stop Dan, the lady snatched the bottle away from him and scolded Dan. Yes scolded ,in a very stern and harsh voice . Both Dan and me were quiet taken aback. And dan even froze in his path for a second. For people who know Dan, it is a big feat for my boy to be still!!!!!! What Dan did was not at all acceptable. You cant walk around picking up others stuffs let alone pull things from their bags. But I was there to stop Dan, the lady could see me moving forward to stop him and finally she could have just smiled and taken the bottle away from him. Or maybe quit that scolding session.

And here is what I wonder? Do you think you have the right to scold others kid? I don’t think so. If the said kid is doing some harm to you or yours, and their parents are doing nothing to stop it, maybe you can step in and stop in a nice way. I can very well understand the itch to give a tight slap to those very badly behaved kids, whose parents think stopping them from anything they do is going to affect them “mentally”!!!!!!!!!!! Maybe hitting them is a service you are doing to society. But even there, I belevie only the parents have the right to admonish their kids. I mean, it is none of my business .

With our kids, I wont mind people who are genuinely interested in them scolding them. I should be satisfied that the said person loves my kids enough to wish for their good and that is the reason they are stopping them.

The other day Ans came visiting and dan was at his crankiest best. She stopped or sternly told him no for one or the other things that he was doing. I wouldn’t even look at that side, because I know she loves him enough to do so…..

Don’t you think you must be wondering what right you have to stop a child or rebuke a child, before you jump headlong into it???

Dan Goes to School

Yes Daniel goes to school. No, he is not old enough to be enrolled into regular school, but given our circumstances he is being sent to a day care which the son refers to as school. He resisted going with all the might a 2 year can muster. Now, if you think that a 2 year old is a harmless type who can be cajoled with a few sweet words you are either a non-parent or a besotted aunt or his grandmother!!!! They are tough creatures. More tough and adamant that adults. And they are the least bothered about throwing tantrums in the middle of the road. So all in all the past 2 weeks were highly stressful. Gin and me would drop him at Amelio. My son would be resolutely declaring “ School bende, Beach”.. Which would translate to, Don’t want school, lets go to beach!!!! How we all wish for that, my son!!!! The floodgates would open as soon as Amelio would come to sight. He will resist with all he is worth to not get out of the car. And his mamma being the monsterella would anyway carry him through the gates. Given a chance his Appa would give him permission to never ever step into a school, if that is what he doesn’t want. So I won’t even consider getting his father’s help. And once Dan realizes that his mamma means business he will say, Mamma – Babo in a very baby-like voice and will lower his head onto my shoulders. I wonder why he says that whenever he is upset with something. Hmmm.. And he is not really sleepy too at that time. He goes in screaming at the top of his voice and trying to squirm him way out of the Ayah’s hands. Finally I leave with a heavy heart and I have the picture of a barely 2 year old wailing for his mamma in front of my eyes all day long.

No, I am not at all guilty. I know he is in a good place with efficient caring people and above all, his Good Father is watching over him. I only want him to settle and have fun in that place. There is lots to do for him and there are really lots of activities done there that will interest him. I only hope that in time he will be fine.

The day care people say that sometime after I leave he becomes kind of ok. But occasionally a wave of longing for his mamma will come and he will softly cry for me. Sigh. Being a mom is a tough tough business L And as soon as he sees me when I go to pick him up, he will cry with his lips pouting and all. And in a few minutes he is my chirpy little squirrel pointing at different things and talking.

Joshua is a whole world apart. He is happy with the maid who looks after him. And he has a wide toothless grin ready for anyone. His father is a pool of mush when the little one smiles at him. Joshua is barely 7 months but he wants to do all things Dan does. By the time he realizes that Dan has acquired better motor skills than him, he is lying flat on the floor and is wailing. A push or a shove or a whack from Dan won’t stop him from going behind his Chahca’s stuffs. No, we don’t encourage Dan being physical with Joshua, but then it happens anyway.

Back home from his day care Dan is cranky for a while. I now realize it is his way of showing his displeaseure from dropping him there all day. If I manage to distract him the evening progresses well with we playing and laughing etc. If he continues in his grim mood, God help us; it is downhill from there…

Touch wood, Dan is slowly settiling into school. He still cries violently when I drop him. Infact since he is familiar with the route now, he will start whining from the time we enter the IT park I work in. But once I leave, he has started to adjust with the people at school.So hopefully the little one will soon find happiness there J

Stuffed Chicken

I have this second cousin, Indu who was also my classmate who runs a food blog. Hmmmm. Well not a blog in my league ,definitely. She has classic recipes, well written and humourous contents and pictures that makes your mouth water for days and crave for the dish. So last week when she posted one about a stuffed chicken, i almost jumped at the idea of making one myself. But most of the evenings i am too tired to venture into anything too elaborate and hence kept it off for the weekend... And as friday came i became really brave and decided to kick start the weekend by baking a cake. So in the evening i baked a banana cake which is best not to be discussed. I blame it on the voltage and the husband on the fluffiness of the whisked eggs. Either way it was a near flop and that i went to bed feeling so terrible.. COme on, i am almost 30 and cant even bake a decent cake. My kids would be the ones who will look open-mouthedly at their classmates who bring out yum home cooked delicasies and would be shocked to find that they are made at homes by their mammas and not bought from bakeries :(

Well saturday morning saw me in a better mood. Or rather Indu's pictures on her blog did set me into a better mood and i went about marinating the chicken etc. And it was then i got a brain wave. She did fry the chicken in oil and i decided to bake it in the oven after half cooking it on the stove... I followed her recipes with slight changes, such as adding some more masalas and finally baked the half-cooked bird in the microwave for 40 minutes at 180C.. The result......

I managed to gather back my lost ego and face in front of the husband... And did have dreams of my kids superiorly opening thier snack boxes laden with goodies baked by their Nigella Lawson-like mom.....

To say the least,we had a very early dinner and a very very heavy dinner tooo.. Phew..........

My Caramel Custard

I like to cook something out of the ordinary for Gin when he is on his evening shift. His shift goes on till 11:00 pm and he is back home a little before midnight on these shifts. They come only once in a blue moon and so it is exciting to plan the mid night meal and cook it. Though he discourages me heavily, I understand that he enjoys these meals immensely as it is something light and something that he definitely enjoys (read as in the sweet variety ) ..

I have been wanting to make this caramel custard for sometime. With the different lents that covered most of August and the first week of September, I couldn’t make it because it involved eggs. So when he went for his evening shift yesterday,I got all excited and decided to make it. Caramelising the sugar was new to me and as any sensible person does when doubt arises, I too researched high and low on faithful google. What I found out was quiet scary. Most sites equated caramelizing sugar to bursting a bomb keeping it in your hands. THe warnings went on like this "Make sure it doesn’t come in contact with water or it can spurt and splash on you and burn you with its very high temperatures ". One site even asked people to wear goggles during the process etc.

Anyway, I took it under my sleeves and went through the process. I was cautious and it was a relatively simple process. The challenge being to know when exactly to switch the stove off so that the caramel attains the right color and taste. I was on the phone with Amma during the process and I guess I caramelized it a bit too much. So much for multi-tasking!!!!!! Anyway, Gin was pretty kicked to see the whole thing when he got back. And can you imagine, between the two of us, we completely polished it off .. hehhehehehJ So now I know what exactly to make when we have guests over.. * When ever that will be…….*

I had actually followed 2 different recipes, because I didn’t want to bake the stuff. And here we go with the recipe which is quiet simple and with a yummy result

For the custard:

Eggs- 3 nos.

Milk -1.5 cups.

Sugar - 1 cup ( i used only .75 cup)

For the caramel:

Sugar - 4 tbsp

A dash of water.

How to make the custard:

Boil the milk.Whisk the eggs and sugar together. (I dont have a hand mixer orblender.So used good old mixie so that i can get a nice fluffy texture)Now add the milk to the blended mixture.Blend well.Keep aside

How to Caramialise :

Take the sugar in a pan and add a dash of water to it.Turn on the heat and swirl the pan inorder to dissolve the sugar.Let the mixture boil. Keep swirling in between.Slowly the mixture will turn it's colour. Once it is a golden browntake it off the stove and immedieately pour it into the dish kept forsetting the pudding in.Make sure the dish is dry, or there is a chanceof the caramel splashing once in contact with water.(I used a cake tinto set the pudding in)Now pour the blended mixture into the same dish.

How to steam:

Cover the top of this dish with a Al. foil.Immerse the dish into a vessel with some water in its bottom.Steam the dish for about 20 minutes or till a knife comes out clean.Now you can refrigerate the pudding . Once it is chilled, invert thepudding onto a serving plate, so that the caramel side comes on top :)

Now sit back and enjoy......

Naming

One of the bloggers i follow, The Blue Bride did write a very nice blog about what her kids addresses their immediate family. I got enthu about it and decided to note down Dan's list over here.

Since Gin and me belong to the same community and to the same state, we call both our parents Appa and Amma. Though it creates confusions at times, we survive by addressing them as Thrissur Appa-Amma and Kottayam Appa-Amma, without much of a disaster.

But when the kid was about to be born i didnt want the baby to distinguish the grandparents with a prefix. I think everyone in my family did call the grandparents on both sides Appacha Ammachi and just differentiated them with the prefix. I used to call my maternal grandparents Vakathanam Appacha-Ammachi and the paternal ones were just Appacha-Ammachi. I wonder how my Amma felt about it. I should remember to ask her the next time :) I clearly didnt want it with our kid. And Gin's niece did rescue me from this situation by starting a tradation of calling the grandparents by Maama-Ajjajja :) Who am i to change this wonderful tradition and hence Daniel's paternal grandparents are Maama-Ajjajja and his maternal grandies are addressed as Appacha-Ammachi :-) Win-win isnt it.....

Daniel is very blessed to have one of his great grandparents around. And all the more now, because he is spending time with her in Kottayam. He and her other great grand kids (6 in all) refer to our Ammachi as Valiyammachi....

Our eldest niece did name her mothers younger sisters as "ko"". It was the short form for Kochamma, which is what mothers younger sisters are addressed as. So Daniel also follows the same and that leaves CHech and her husband. They are refered to as Valiyammi and valiyappa. I find that very cute. The brother is addressed as Ammacha and the big cousin brothers caption is still remaining blank ,but his wife will be called P ammayi....

We havent yet decided what Dan will call GIn's brother and wife... I guess we will go with G chachen and R kochamma, the same way as Gin refers to his Appa's brothers and wives.

I think the important people or the people with whom Daniel will interact frequently are named and to his credit he recognises most of them. It was simply amazing when he recongnised whom we were talking about when the subject of Bek-Nan-Tama came up and he promptly pointed to their snaps on the refrigerator. And i dont think he remembers seeing them around 4 months back in May.

Another name worth mentioning is one of my cousins on my Amma's side. She insisted on making Daniel address her as Mema :) I guess that is how northern kerala folks address mothers younger sister. :)

So that is how the nomenclature goes on in the Punnoose family.....

Happy Onam

Today is Onam. And as a shame to the Malayali community all
over the world, I am not at all enthu about this festival. I guess the hype and
the glam even in God’s own country has ebbed off, with people buying instant
lunches etc. But with the newly acquired neighborhood friends here at Madras,we have decided to have a combined Onam celebration at their place. Pot luck style. Anyway, they
have a television at their place and I will get to watch nice old Mal movie and
the husband will get to eat enjoy the spread. Don’t get me wrong. I am not
planning to skip dinner or anything. Just mentioned how the situation is
win-win for both of us.

Talking about husband, yesterday evening he was nostalgically
mentioning about how his Onam of yester years were.. He was describing about the
puli-inji curry and the payasam his mom used to make and how he is
craving for the same. To my MIL’s defense, she makes such yum puli-inji
curry. It was at this precise moment I handed him a cheese sandwich; on the day of Onnaam Onam. God bless Gin, he devoured the cheese sandwich with the same gusto that he would have emptied a bowl of paalada paayasam … ;-)Sigh, thank God for small mercies in
life.

The son did celebrate the Onam in style though. Like father,
like son. He was hooked onto the payasam that was made at home in Kottayam yesterday.
He wanted more and more and finally my Amma had to hide it from the little one.
Also he wore his Onam outfit and went for an Onam celebration… For good measure
my Amma did tie a naada around his mundu so that it wont slip off
and show the diaper beneath it and humiliate the boy :P.. They have taken
photographs and I am waiting for them to arrive.. So as an answer to people who
ask me what I am craving for, it is for that snap of our little bubblegum in his Onam
mundu :) :)

So Happy Onam Folks. Have a great one

Today we were on the phone with Amma and got to hear Dan in his element. Hooting and screaming and generally making merry. And for our listening pleasure Amma tickled him and made him laugh out loud. THe laughter that comes out of sheer pleasure and right from his tummy :D. In a way i was happy that he is happy where he is and with whom he is. But then there was also this urge to hold him close and squish and feel his tiny wriggly body against mine.. And Ï"wanted to be the person tickling him and making him laugh. Sigh... I can see a visit to Ktym in the nearest future but that is not good enough..... God give me the serenity to pass through this trial....

Well and while i was mopping around with this thought i came upon this blog and stumbled into this post. I wish i could impart this kind of wisdom to the kids... Maybe i can just divert him to the World Wide Web, instead!!!!!! Anyway, cross posting it here

Simple kind of man.....

Mama told me when I was young

Come sit beside me, my only son

And listen closely to what I say.

And if you do thisIt will help you some sunny day.

Take your time… dont live too fast,

Troubles will come and they will pass.

Go find a woman and youll find love,

And dont forget son,

There is someone up above.

And be a simple kind of man.

Be something you love and understand.

Be a simple kind of man.

Wont you do this for me son,

If you can?

Forget your lust for the rich mans gol

dAll that you need is in your soul,

And you can do this if you try.

All that I want for you my son,

Is to be satisfied.

Boy, dont you worry…

youll find yourself.

Follow you heart and nothing else.

And you can do this if you try.

All I want for you my son,

Is to be satisfied.

Lovely,isnt it???????? And leaving with a snap of Daniel... Just woken up from deep sleep and looking all paavam :)